I wrote this piece last year on my 9 week voyage alone from Switzerland to Sicily with a backpack and no itinerary except for start and end. This was a picture i took on the plane when I wrote this. 8/8/2019
I’m addicted to love.
I’m addicted to love so much that it comes with hurt.
But the more I balance hurt with love,
The more I love that little bit more than the hurt.
My life transits from filling my moments with significance to capturing still moments that flood my nuero-static being.
In essence, I capture still shots with my soul’s windows and I leave the gates of my heart wide open.
My eyes will water, my chest swells and 100 memories laying dormant, surface up.
I’m 8 years old putting dad’s gloves on.
Loading up our trailer full of spring water we collected from the mountains.. this particularly stood out.
How I miss you.
And through this bleed, I remembered again.
Like 50 first dates with my soul, every day I live and die for this.
I opt to learn I’m a nobody, who figures out he’s a somebody, but actually was always everybody.
And everyday after the process I awaken as the identity of existence itself.
Yet it’s perculiar it is.. I see humans who choose to live inside the false sense of reality, that, a security exists inside the world we’re ‘bound’ rejecting a truth hidden deep within a framed game of themselves.
See the world becomes much like a pinball machine with each ball representing significant charters to your existence.
Money, status, housing, hell even how you’re represented.
A pinball machine only serves the player a purpose if a score is in place, locking the set.
Remove the score and what is the point of keeping the balls away from it’s impending doom to fall through to its end?
The system was designed to always be played with a slant.
It was designed to come to an end leaving you a number that represents how well you scored in life and 3 letters to remember your ego by..
Because CDY on the top score will echo through the sound universe?
A title waiting to be replaced and I’m here to stress that significance with chains of events otherwise?
I think not.
When one sees the pinball machine for what it is, one understands that there is the world that of the machine and the world outside of it.
When one plays, they play with no attachment, no fear or worry because the game was solved before the bright lights and loud sounds attracted the play in the first place.
With this in mind, therefore, one can supply an ample amount of focus to it’s mechanics.
I hit my high scores quite young.. now I play to experience.
Place me infront of a memory unfolding a million memories over a moment acquiring a million validations.
50 dates ending in a day, love hurt and everything in between.
My vouch for the human experience..
This wins for me every time.
– A Date with the Arcade