There are two chains to the psyche. A measure of success, and the measure of validation.
This particular topic is something I could explore on relentlessly, as I have been the king of requiring validation in the past, through to having done all the work to free myself from this particular chain.
Why do we have it?
Why do we protect its idea?
Often when I challenge the topic, it’s defended like the nicotine of a vape or a ciggarette.
There’s justification to why it happens, “It’s part of life, It’s all apart of it?”
Validation should not be confused with our need for connection and love.
Validation is like the mutated version of these two combined.
It seeks to prove that exsitence of self is better then a version of self where one is deeply not happy with.
It acts as fuel, or food. Constantly looking to survive.
If you think of social media and why these “Free” platforms work so well, because the they have provided an all-you-can-prove buffet to have that validating gluttony fulfilled.
We all know it, we’ve all done it, we’ve all seen it.
Whether you’re a person constantly posting photos for gratification, and “you’re just showing love for yourself”
Or are sharing your opinions about topics that are not actual deep truths, “You’re educating people”
The instant appears so cleverly between people, and the shadow remains buried.
Are you reading this post?
How did you get here?
Did I share this to try to validate my topic on validation?
You stumbled across it, and decided to read it.
I don’t care if this is read or not read, and this is where the result of a resolved issue around validation lies.
To explore the shadow of self so deep that you realise your existence is not just the cause of a divine spectacle, that you are literal as a protaginst to a story revolved around you.
Are you? Or do we fall inlove with movies as they validate our psyche as we engross into the character and lives reflecting selves.
If we humans are all created as human opportunity to become more, why do some die so young? why do some live horrific lives? Why are some born with misforturne?
The western culture of living as engulfed the psyche in being the center of attention to existence itself.
I used to believe this was true too, turn an eye away from misfortune, and say something like “They get to also have these opportunities too.” Pretty sure there was no purpose for the millions of death of an atomic bomb caused by the conflict and evolution of a child-like society with such immense power.
Tell that to those that die by environmental causes, and by collective residue of power in action.
To validate self, is a chain bred for diaster, seeping through quality of life and quality to those all around them.
For some, this is crippling, for others, acceptance.
As a human passionate about self-discovery, to continue to fall through the abyss of curisioty of emotion and psyche, it’s not something that I care to have in my life. I feel gifts are wasted, an deeper sense of opportunities are passed before they could even fruition.
If I was to love being validated, I create a chasm, turning my potential for realising opportunities into high-risk scenarios that will end up with me “giving up.”
And ultimately the death of creation.
You do not need validation to have a successful and loving life. There is more to give when we don’t view ourselves as the center of the universe.
And the interesting phenomena about this, is that the more we give without expectation, without a sense in our body desiring or needing a form of validation. The more we recieve.
It is a hard acceptance when it challenges our very own egos of being, taught that we indeed deserve everything, should have everything, and validate our entire lives, neglecting that life doesn’t operate as a progressive chart, profiting year on out.
A peaceful terms of accepetance is understanding the existence of the duo and working through the why we need it. What are we really trying to run away from? Or what is it that we deeply are longing for?
All riddled in how we present it, and what we deeply want from it.